It came down to three words that are usually pleasant to hear – “I miss you.”
The only problem was that she saw me every day in-world and on various social media sites and rarely said hello. Thus, “I miss you” rang false and hollow. I’d grown used to this kind of lip service. I’d know for awhile that actual friendship, daily chats, getting together, ect was a thing of the past. Honestly, that we talked at all was a minor miracle.
We’d know each other casually for awhile and then she started finding out that she was a sub. As we talked about it, we grew closer. “You are one of the three people I trust unreservedly,” she told me. I don’t know who the third is/was, but I know that two of us are gone.
I knew in my heart getting involved would end badly. But what she presented was so perfect and together, it compelled me to find out what lived behind the façade. It’s not pretty. The details confuse even me and there’s no need to recount them. Simply, I patiently listened to her bitch about her dom (I refused to cap him), held her hand and was a good friend. The guy is a collector, not a real Dom. (Example – once after asked me to use her while she was edging he didn’t even bothered with after care. He was fucking some other girl and couldn’t be bothered.) He decided he wanted this one girl but she was a switch. It was a measure of my own devotion that I allowed myself to be used as “bait”. Their words, not mine. Again – I knew it would end badly but I had to follow it through. This guy was such an ineffective dom that he never even claimed his new prize. We had a family for maybe about two months. He never bothered to define our roles so basically we sat around waiting for him to finish fucking some girl hoping he’d pay attention to us. Usually, he’d fall asleep. I got bored. My new Owner got bored. One night I snapped and aired all the complaints my sister had said to me.
A real Dom wouldn’t have stood for it. He did. He has no power at all which, I believe, is why he collects girls. They soon find him out for the fraud he is. My sister, though, being new to the whole thing and arrogant enough to believe that after a scant year of service she knew everything, stood by her first dom She refused to admit that the complaints I aired were complaints she’d aired with me just scant months before. Again, an actual Dom would have worked to resolve the situation. He went off and found some new girls to fuck.
My sister and I tried to reach an uneasy peace. We kind of did. Until she went to meet him RL. Leading up to it, she told me that he’d be the only one she’d let fuck in the ass. As the time drew closer, she talked about various strategies to make it appear as though they were online but were actually off fucking somewhere. Though it all, despite my hatred of him, I supported her.
The time arrived and, suddenly, she told me that all this stuff about fucking him wasn’t real. She wasn’t going to. They got together and soon they posted a picture of her in a collar. Later that night, she added “waking you up at 4am and fucking you back to sleep.”
I told her she was no longer my sister.
She was furious that I made what seemed to be an obvious assumption.
Let me stop and own up to something. After the “family” fell apart, I tried to hold onto her too closely. I was annoying. I’m not proud of myself.
After a bit of a hiatus, we tried to work through it all, but it was unfixable. I knew better than to trust her. She’d RL fucked two people at least one of which her husband didn’t know about. Call me cynical, but under those circumstance there’s no good reason to trust her.
I told her I was taking time off from talk with her. She seemed almost genuinely sad. When I came back, she was happy. So happy that she rarely spoke with me. I invited her to meet my new Owners. I invited her to meet my new friends. She invited me to…nothing. When I’d point out that we could talk outside of SL, she’d say she wasn’t on skype a lot…or gchat…or text messaging…or facebook or…or…or.
Thus, when she said, “I miss you” she was being, to put it nicely, disingenuous. And that was the final straw. I sent her a goodbye email re-iterating what I’d told her before – I had no interest in a passve, hi/bye friendship. She had no use for my friendship and I was done.
I really shouldn’t have been surprised by the outcome. But it still sucks. Please understand – I don’t see myself as a victim. I walked into it myself. At times, I did not make good choices. At times, I would have thought I was an asshole, too.
I don’t know what will happen to them. Sometimes first-time relationships work out forever. I’ll never know. Nor do I want to.
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